Tigger likes to Bounce

Here in the Warsaw there are hundreds of banks. Thousands maybe. Possibly even three hundred billion, zillion, BobDylian but not one of them catering for woodencats. Luckily, we have a genius in our ranks.

Mog has created the first online bank exclusively for woodencats. It's called EMBANK. (Electronic Mog) and it has lots of funky new products and an introductory offer of a can of furniture polish that has certainly got me interested.

By far the most innovative product is the 'Tigger likes to bounce' card. It's a card for young, woodencats who say 'funky, yeah, afterka and Grrrr!' (I have advised against giving one to Harvey as he only counts to four and Barney because...... well, I don't need to explain)

The card has a perpetually rising credit limit which goes up and up until you just can't afford to pay it, at which point, you 'bounce' it! However, it was important to find out, just how high the Tigger likes to bounce card, should bounce.

We took the card and bounced it 473 times. It was difficult as the card is not very paw friendly. The average height of bounce was 1m. 43cm. I'm on a shelf 2 metres off the ground so I can't have one. It was disappointing and I phoned to complain. Unfortunately, as Mog is running the business single pawed, there is an answering machine saying:

'All of our Catorators are busy at the moment, SO GO SNIFF A DOG'S BUTT - LOSER!'

I was shocked and I will raise the matter at the next lesson.

The other problem is that despite thorough research on the money markets, (including Tubbytext) none of us can find any information on the centimetre to zloty exchange rate. Until then, all transactions are on hold.

Perhaps I'll invest in furniture polish.I believe reserves are running low and rising prices have already caused French cleaning ladies to burn their dusters. When I've cleaned up on the cleaning materials market, I'll get a better shelf; one the doesn't overlook the Skup. A shelf of 1m 43 - low enough for the Tigger likes to bounce card. 'Funky, Yeah!, Afterka, Grrrr!


Sorry - I forgot to mention. Today is Furniture Polish and Cat Litter Day.