Abducted by aliens again - can you believe it? Twice in the space of a few months. That’s a worry because clearly the part of outer space called ‘A few months’ is a risky place to be. I had a word with Man about the house but he couldn’t give a monkey’s. All he wants to do these days is teach Harvey to be a circus cat - personally, I think it’s rather degrading.He’s devised a number of games such as ‘Rolly polly puss’ which seems to involve a lot of tummy and foot tickling - Yuk! Then we have the futile activity called, ‘Where’s that cat?’ Man about the house puts a jumper over him and asks, ‘where’s that cat? Pretty bloody obvious I’d say.’ He’s barking and it’s no co-incidence that insanity is connected to dogs - ‘Mad dogs and Englishmen’ for example.
Lady of the house has also lost the plot. On our return from ‘the space of a few months’ we discovered she had allowed in an intruder - not a wooden cat but a wooden dog - frankly, I didn’t think such a thing existed. He’s called Thurber and he sits on the window ledge next to another new arrival called Bartek from Zakopane. That’s his whole name. At least he’s a cat. The ledge is overcrowded and is almost a slum dwelling now. Harvey has a large wooden box there full of drobne which he guards fiercely but also Man about the house has given him an extra responsibility. This is an evening job in which he has to watch the garden below for signs of naughty cats - if there’s any sign of a kafuffle, he has to call the Cat Police immediately. It’s as well that he has never done it as Barney would be in clink most nights.
Well it’s a nice clear night to look out for naughty cats and I can even see some stars - or is that a spaceship? If it carries on, I will relocate to a space of a few years - I’ve heard it’s much safer there.
Name day - the sound, ‘twang’
Muchy na Riby
Fabric Conditioner
(Barney’s sure to get drunk with so many celebrations on one day!)
