Family Tree

The Prodigal started it when Parsnip was born and he wanted to find out who her forefathers were. I was confused because I thought humans could only have one father but now it seems you can have up to four. This must make it really complicated when you try to trace your roots and draw your family tree.

Bartek suggested we should trace our family tree and foolishly, I agreed but we soon ran into difficulties. The first was that because we live in an apartment, (with Skup view) we don’t have a tree, let alone a family one. Instead, we decided to adopt a tree that wasn’t owned by a family and we chose one on Plocka. Next, we tried to trace it but it’s quite a big tree and we had to stick a lot of pieces of tracing paper together and tangled up our paws in taszma. Even so, the end result was more of a brass-rubbing than a tracing and I’m not sure what we learnt apart from ‘don’t try to trace a tree.’ Some people spend hours going through church records but usually, they don’t have much of a collection - not even any Elvis Presley. They say that, ‘God moves in a mysterious way’, but no Elvis?

Anyway, it’s a well known fact that wooden cats come from two ancient families and originate in Thailand. The first is the ‘Cat’ family as featured in Chinese astrology and Al Stewart’s ‘Year of the cat.’ The other line is Tiger Woods, the golfer who wrote our family song; it goes like this:

We don’t have a tree
But a freezer full of ice-cream
We don’t have leaves
But a Thai sports stream
We ain’t that bad
But we ain’t that good
We’re all made ‘o woooooood (yo)
In the cat neighbourhood (shudup already!)

Name day:

False moustache
Wig glue